"To make peace between two individuals (in comparison) is worthier than one's entire prayers and fastings."~ Prophet Muhammad (P.B.U.H)
If you see old Indian movies, plenty of the story lines would involve two die-hard best friends turning into aggressive enemies and a common third party who would continously litter the relationship, add to the bitterness and exploit the situation to their advantage. And as the story proceeds generations pass, the culprit is unvieled and towards the end of the movie the friends turned foe turn friends again and to the joy of everyone all is good in the end.
What is depicted in the reel life is actually what does happen to some in real life.Sadly, all real life stories don't have happy reunions.And also, although there is an entire possibility that a crooked third person exists to break the friendship\relationship apart, sometimes there is no third party adding fuel to the firey situation but the twosome themselves. Rather there could be a common well wisher who attempts to restore peace but in vain. Ego,anger or any other element stops either of the two from restoring friendship. Or maybe one of the two people tries to make harmony but is shunned by the other.Life goes on and the close friends turn into strangers and die with perhaps lots of regret at heart.
People are important, relationships are important but then what is so important that it holds back two people from restoring peace amongst themselves. I understand situations can get intense,extreme and seriously offensive but I fail to understand where does the love go? Where does the care go? Where does the good go?. How can somebody chose to be at unrest with another for life, be it somebody close or not?
No matter whose fault it is, and who is wrong, why doesn't one be the first to extend the hand of peace? Does it degrade ones honor, self esteem or pride? I don't think so. No body is perfect. Everybody makes mistakes.It's inevitable.But sadly everybody doesn't have the capability to accept a mistake and take responsibilty for his actions. Also no body likes to be criticized. I personally feel criticism in the right manner is totally healthy and helps one nurture himself. One of the Imam's said : "The most favorable friend to me is that who shows me my flaws"
Coming to the hadith, it simply stunned me. It's incredilble. Just look at the reward for establishing peace between two individuals. 'worthier then one's entire prayers and fastings' It massive.It's worth an effort.The Hadith speaks for itself.
So next time if somebody honors us by confiding in us and shares with us an upsetting situation apart from saying words of comfort and offering some advice we should encourage our friend to initiate peaceful talk.And if we happen to be a mutual friend, then it would be a good idea to hear both sides of the story and try to get both parties talking and sorting their issue out in a just and fair manner.
Normally we feel we would be interferring in anothers personal issue or don't want to take such a responsibility or an added burden Sometimes we are least bothered about another's fight and just like hearing the details for the sake of gossip. Not good!
I believe if we happen to be a sincere mutual friend of two friends in distress we'll be driven to help out our friends out of care, even if there is no incentive of reward. We wouldn't be concerned about our person gain. Would we?
I find this saying of the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H) relevant :
"Someone who possesses knowledge on a subject but conceals it when he is asked will be bridled with reins of fire."(Therefore, if a person possesses information that would help a bewildered person and improve his situation but he remains silent, he has surely committed a great sin.) Mapping this to the topic, if we are somebody with adequate information about a disturbing situation, we shouldn't wait to be asked for help, rather come forward on our own and save the day for our friends. If we feel, our friend is wrong, we should correct him politely with lots of humbleness and offer our guidance and not hold back out of the fear of offending him.
When we hear about disturbance between two people the least we can do it make a little prayer of peace for them. May Allah guide us all. Ameen
Peace 2 All.