Monday, 19 January 2009


~Helen Ward drew for One Tree Hill


Saira Andleeb once wrote "There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who wont any more, and who always will. So don't worry about the people from your past, there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future" BUT "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories" and there's a reason for that too !

My thoughts:

The loss of a dear one is saddening. Unfortunately or fortunately people do leave, but they don't always leave. Sometimes they come back. Destiny has ways of bringing them back to us. Destiny brings together people who are meant to be together, for better or for worse. They say it is destined. They say it is written. Indeed it is! But do we sit back when we fear losing someone, hoping that destiny would magically bring them back to us. NAY! we fight for them! By doing so, sometimes the stars change course. Sometimes destinies are written to be erased and rewritten by forces of love! But sometimes we have to have the courage to let go and embrace destiny and have faith that Allah wills for the better. In such conflicting times the heart knows the difference. The guidance comes from within. God speaks through hearts. Listen to the inner voice. Celebrate!


khany said...

thanks for sharing syra. i gather from your post that there are two ways one can react to a loved one drifting away from us. we can either "fight for them" and defy destiny or we can "embrace destiny" and allow them to leave.

personally, however, i feel it is a terribly bad idea to base an argument on destiny when planing future actions. none of us has knowledge of the unseen and in particular we don't know if the parting that we are experiencing is temporary or permanent. we can accept and embrace the past as something that had been ordained for us. however, we cannot embrace the future which is unbeknownst to us and has yet to unfold.

planning for the future should be based on reason. there are many questions one might ask in deciding whether we should struggle or let go, e.g.
- can i bring myself to trust this person again?
- can i forgive this person?
is my ego preventing me from compromising?
- am i giving up my dignity?

however we cannot, we should not, base our decision on the question:
- is it my destiny to be with this person?

this simply because we don't know the answer to the question. in fact, nobody knows the answer but god.

Syra said...

nicely explained...that's what i attempted to did it way better!.Bravo! (Y)

Saira Andleeb said...

I cant agree more! :)

"Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it’s cracked up to be. That’s why people are so cynical about it. … It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don’t risk anything, you risk even more."

~Erica Jong


M. Hassan M. said...

I don't know why am I writing here but I really want my name to be written here on such a wonderful explanation by some thoughtful minds :)

Wonderful Post it is ...

In Love, you choose nothing. Just can't. Love happens and we fall into it. The worst (or best) part is that we can't even get out of it, whether we are with the person or not. So, the only option we are left with is to embrace it. Not to get something out of it but to give something more. Trust me, we enjoy losing ! Losing something more into it :)

As they say:
Khud ko bhula ker tut ker chaho to baat hey,
Werna to chahtey sir-bazaar aam hain

Syra said...

wow Hassan! very sweetly said.

hadi said...

Nice post.....
Well I only believe that whosoever walks in one's life or all has a reason...sometimes we understand and sometimes we dont....

But the best thing is that each person u have been close to, leaves his/her traces on your personality....they may be scars or they may be good memories....but we learn from each one of them...thats what what makes us humane ....and gives us a hope to live like a more groomed individual...happy and contended :)

Saira Andleeb said...

nicely said Hassan! :)

"That man can have nothing but what he strives for" (Quran 53:39)

Syra said...

jee Hadia, I agree..ppl we get close to either stamp our heart with scars or warmness..we should ensure our stamp is a hearty one :)

Saira, i loved the quote by erica jong!

The Mute Spectator said...

The heart knows nothing but to beat itself crazy over things that sometimes don't even make enough sense to be taken seriously...

It is like a faulty puncture in the protective shell of a soul... Allowing impurities to come in and contaminate what little integrity our conscience may have left!

In conflicting times, the heart does know the difference indeed! The question is, can it be trusted?

Saira Andleeb said...

I kind of agree, One does come across such conflicting times. I think its a matter of how one has been sensitizing/purifying her heart (and Nafs).

What i would do in such conflicting times is ask the beings i trust, and ask God through the Istekhara prayer.

Syra said...

Some wise person once said "Life doesn't provide warranties and guarantees, it only provides possibilities and opportunities for those who dare to make the best use of it"

The way I see it, you have to TRY (in a righteous manner) to earn anything you desire(a halal desire). Rest is up to the Almighty. You might not get what you strived for but at least you will have no regrets and eventually be at peace with your self and that is worth alot. Also we tend to value things more which we get as fruit of our handwork. so win-win in both cases

It's once in a blue moon that your heart sets on some thing\one. Is it not worth striving for?

Making the isthikhara dua is a good practice (Y).