How to really love a child

Children are miraculous indeed. They make you young again :)

Traits of a best friend

'So who is your best friend' is a question frequently asked. I have come up with a list of traits I find befitting on that one person you can label as your best friend.

- someone around whom you can be yourself; no formality, no judgements

- someone with you can talk about anything and everything; the good, the bad, the jokes, the serious talks, the whining, the laughters

- someone who is always there for you in the hour of need or otherwise; this could be as light as getting together for an unplanned icecream craving or as serious as being the first one to help you out of some deep trouble

- someone who will walk an extra mile for you

- someone whose company is always welcome

- someone with whom you share the same rights and wrongs

Hmmmm, what more, add to my list =)

 

Courteous or Hypocrite?

If I don't like you and yet I behave nicely, does that make me courteous or a hypocrite?

2 node circular link list

A couple of days back I was flicking through channels and ultimately STAR World caught my attention. The thrilling t.v series BONES was on air. I dont't follow it, regardless I stopped on the channel. That very interest my friend Zahida came to my mind and I thought of her. Interesting thing here is that Zahida loves the show and finds a resemblance between me and the leading character of BONES. So she says whenever she watches it 'saira yaad atee hai'...i.e she is reminded of me. And now the same show reminds me of her :)

For me, this happens often that a circular link of rememberance is formed. When a thing\event\happening reminds someone of me, then an association between that thing\event\happening and the person who recalls me is formed in mind.

Generalizing this if a certain thing reminds someone of you, then that same certain thing will remind you of that someone :) I hope I am making sense and not sounding crazy to the readers here. Does such an association build up in your mind too?

Elements of Uniqueness in humanbeings

I am compiling a list of elements that is unique in every human being. The level of detail that Allah has put to make individuals distinct from one other is simply amazing. Please add on to my list.

1- voice

2- style of talking

3- structure of face

4- height

5- built

6- style of walking, footsteps.

7- pattern on our palms

8- pattern under our feet

9-skin pattern on our hands, (if you look closely the waves of lines, and scattered line patters vary from person to person)

10-color of skin

11- color of eyes

12- mannerism

13- postures

14- bone structure 15- weight

16- structure of hair eg: straight, curly, wavy

17- color of hair eg brown, golden, black

18- and ofcourse personality traits vary from every individual some of these elements are similar amongst siblings and family but on a whole every single humanbeing is like no other. There are/have been billions of humans but so many permutations courtesy Allah. SubhanAllah

new additions by UFKhan

19- Retinal patterns. These are very unique - even twins don't have the same retinal patterns

20- Size of eyeballs and shape of Eyebrows

21- Diameter of aorta

22- shape of Nails

23- Length and thickness of eyelashes

24- Size/shape and whiteness of Teeth

25- Skin appearance, besides color

26- Structure of nose

27-Fluffiness of hair

28- Size of feet

29- Blood group

30- Structure of Brain

31) Genes - being part of the DNA, they carry genetic information responsible for a large number of physical features.

32) Degree of righteousness of one's Heart

33) Mind/Mentality Certain non-physical elements probably have the most weightage in determining the uniqueness and distinction of individuals, e.g. (32) and (33).

A Teacher and A CEO

The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life. One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?" To stress his point he said to another guest; "You're a teacher, Barbara. Be honest. What do you make?"
Barbara, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied, "You want to know what I make? (She paused for a second, and then began...)
"Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could. I make a C+ feel like the Congressional Medal of Honor winner.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of class time when their parents CAN'T make them sit for 5 without an I Pod, Game Cube or movie rental.
You want to know what I make? (She paused again and looked at each and every person at the table)
I make kids wonder.
I make them question.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions.
I teach them to write and then I make them write. Keyboarding ISN'T EVERYTHING.
I make them read, read, read.
I make them show all their work in maths. They use their God given brain, not the man-made calculator.
I make my students from other countries learn everything they need to know about English while preserving their unique cultural identity.
I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.
Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they were given,
work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life (Barbara
paused one last time and then continued.)
Then, when people try to judge me by what I make, with me knowing money isn't everything, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention because they are ignorant.
You want to know what I make?
I MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
What do you make Mr. CEO?
His jaw dropped, he went silent.

A profound answer!

Courtesy ~ A friend

Value has a value only if its value is valued

she said....

if you die i will kill you
~S

before time takes 'you' or 'them' away

Things must be sorted out before it's too late

Chances must be availed before you don't have any to miss

Mistakes must be accepted before there is nothing left to repeat

Feelings must be shared before they turn to cold to be warmed

Temper must be tapped off before it costs you a world

Words must be appreciated before they lose their charm

Take some time out for your beloved ones before time takes you or them away

I believe so, do you?

~courtesy a friend

What are friends for? A Longer Life

NYTimes: In the quest for better health, many people turn to doctors, self-help books or herbal supplements. But they overlook a powerful weapon that could help them fight illness and depression, speed recovery, slow aging and prolong life: their friends.
Read On

True friends are a blessing from Allah. My friends & family make me healthier, alhamdulillah
=)

For what's it worth----Protect It

The quote below striked to me. It's from the movie Pursuit of Happiness which is based on the inspiring true story on the struggle in the life of Christopher Gardner.

"You got a dream... You gotta protect it. People can't do somethin' themselves, they wanna tell you you can't do it. If you want somethin', go get it. Period. "
~Christopher Gardner [to his son]

I also liked the following quote from the movie The curious case of Benjamin Button. The movie itself is interesting too. It's longer then the usual Hollywood movies and gets a bit slow. Nevertheless I liked it and would recommend it. The movie has no twists and turns. It's simply about the life of a person who ages backwards and that's the whole charm of the movie.

"For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again."

~Benjamin Button [Voice over; letter to his daughter]

I've learned

Written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words.

I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular .

I've learned.... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher..

I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost, someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Mom and Dad that I loved them one more time before they passed away.

I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned.... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned..... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

The Splashes of Life

My grandfather took me to the fishpond on the farm when I was about seven and he told me to throw a stone into the water.

He told me to watch the waves created by the stone, and then he asked me to think of myself as that stone.

"You may create a lot of splashes in your life, but remember the waves that come from those splashes will affect the peace of all your fellow creatures," he said.

"Remember that you are responsible for what you throw into your circle, and that your waves will touch many other circles. Always try to live in a way that the waves that come from your circle send out the peace of your goodness to other circles."

"Remember the waves that come from anger and jealousy will also send those feelings to other circles. You are responsible for all the waves."

That was the first time I realized each person creates the inner peace or discord that flows out into the world.

We cannot create world peace if we are riddled with inner conflict, hatred, doubt and anger. We radiate the feelings and thoughts that we hold inside whether we voice them or not. Whatever is sloshing around inside of us is spilling out into the world, creating beauty or discord with all the other circles of life.

Remember the eternal wisdom: WHATEVER YOU FOCUS ON EXPANDS

[Author Unknown]

Courtesy A friend

No pain, No gain! Must there always be pain?

"Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken." But I wonder if there's no breaking then there's no healing, and if there's no healing then there's no learning. And if there's no learning then there's no struggle. But the struggle is a part of life. So must all hearts be broken?"

~ Quote in italic by Albert Camus
Description quote taken from One Tree Hill.
Image by Helen Ward

Some good moments of life

• To laugh until it hurts your stomach
• To clear your last exam
• To fall in love
• To hear accidentally that somebody said something good of you
• To pass a while with your best friends
• To see an old friend again and to feel things haven't changed
• To wake up and realize it is still possible to sleep a couple of hours
• To have tea and dry fruit with family in winter evenings
• To see a sleeping baby smile
• To know that someone is smiling with heart because of something you said or did
• To unexpectedly find some money in an old jacket pocket / purse / drawer
  
• To learn a lesson for life from a person you don't know at all. For example: words of wisdom from a taxi driver, or a laborer
• To come across a funny note scribbled on an old notebook written by a friend in one of the boring lectures
• To feel the warmth when someone brings your/their favorite chocolate for you
• To be warmly greeted by your mommy in the morning as if you were still a baby
• To have garam garam pakoray made by mama on the first winter\summer rain
• To sit on a big rock on top of a mountain and watch the sunset and sunrise
• To take a lot of photos with a lot of excitement, (like a kid playing with his precious most toy) specially with your brand new camera
• To read letters from old friends
  
• To view old photo albums
• To dine on the iftari table with family
  
• To win a bet.
• To complete the final stage of a video game
  
• To see a smile on Mom's/Dad's face.
• To win a heated argument.
• To have your favorite meal be it savour or chicky meal or a sizzling steak or a cheesy lasgnia :). Also to have your favourite scrumptious dessert.
  
• To fix a really hard bug (specific to software engineers) or complete a work related module
  

Thanks for contributing everyone. God bless you all with these happy moments and more =)

Where to tap

Ever heard the story of the giant ship engine that failed? The ship's owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine.

Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a youngster.

He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

Two of the ship's owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do. After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer.

He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life.

He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed! A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for ten thousand dollars.
"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!"
So they wrote the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized bill."

The man sent a bill that read:

Tapping with a hammer - $ 2.00

Knowing where to - $ 9998.00

Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference!

Courtesy: Zunaira

Plan, but understand that we only live by Allah’s grace

Sometimes Allah breaks our spirit to save our soul.
Sometimes Allah breaks our heart to make us whole.
Sometimes Allah allows pain so we can be stronger.
Sometimes Allah sends us failure so we can be humble.
Sometimes Allah allows illness so we can take better care of ourselves.
Sometimes Allah takes away some things from us so we can learn the value of everything He gave us.
Plan, but understand that we only live by Allah’s grace.

~Anonymous

NYTimes: Girl Power at School, but Not at the Office

By HANNAH SELIGSON

I was born in 1982 — about 20 years after the women’s rights movement began. Growing up in what many have called a post-feminist culture, I did not really experience institutional gender bias. “Girl power” was celebrated, and I felt that all doors were open to me.

When I was in college, the female students excelled academically, sometimes running laps around their male counterparts. Women easily ascended to school leadership positions and prestigious internships. In my graduating class (more than half of which was female) there was a feeling of camaraderie, a sense that we were helping each other succeed.

Then I left the egalitarianism of the classroom for the cubicle, and everything changed. The realization that the knowledge and skills acquired in school don’t always translate at the office is something that all college graduates, men and women, must face. But for women, I have found, the adjustment tends to be much harder. It was certainly hard for me — I lasted only nine months in my first job out of college.

Inspired by my own rocky entrance into the work world, I decided to interview other young women and discovered that many of them, like me, were facing a steep workplace learning curve. What was it, I wondered, that was making our first career steps so wobbly when we had been so accomplished and self-assured in school?

Read On

It has a life if its own

I try to log on to the Internet, but its not working. It's never been the same since I destroyed the connection. I called various technicians, but when the finally turned up, they could not find any thing wrong with the computer. They asked me what I was complaining about, spent half an hour doing tests, changed configuration, and assured me that the problem lay not with me but with the server. I allowed myself to be convinced that everything was, in fact, fine and I felt ridiculous for having asked for help. Two or three hours later, the computer and the connection would crash. Now, after months of physical and psychological wear and tear, I simply accept that technology is stronger and more powerful than me: it works when it wants to, and when it doesn't, it's best to sit down and read the paper or go for a walk, and just wait until the cables and the telephone links are in a better mood and the computer decides to work again. I am not, I have discovered, my computer's master: it has a life if its own.

~Paulo Cohelo
The Zahir

Life goes on.....